…the New York Times salutes you – in their article, Plugging in to Make a Joyful Noise Unto the Lord.
My favourite line in this story is where Senior Pastor Tom Mercer is talking about the 20 million dollar kids complex he wants to build,
“If I ask God’s people to give me $20 million,” Mr. Mercer said during an interview in his corner office, “when I stand before God someday, I don’t want to hear him say, ‘Dude, you wasted a ton of my money.’ I want him to say, ‘You did a good job.’ My definition of a good job is that it will impact people until Christ comes back.”
But Tom, Dude, what’s God’s definition of a good job. Perhaps it’s more like, I dunno, to like, "do justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with your God." And Tom, I’m afraid that if God uses Valspeak with you, he’d probably start with Napoleon Dynamite’s favourite epithet.
As an afterthought, Tom might also benefit from a first person pronoun fast.