Jr. Ed Young Knows – Sex Sells

kinnon —  November 24, 2008 — 18 Comments

Screwing4Jesus.jpg

Perhaps you've been fortunate not to have heard.

Ed Young Jr., he of approximately 20,000 sheep (give or take a few hundred stolen by sheep-stealing former associate pastors), has decreed seven days of sex. For married couples only, of course.

Ed wrote me this week to talk about this campaign of his. He said, "This is exactly the kind of raw, real and relevant information that Ed and Lisa know the church needs to be talking about." Sure, it's odd that Ed talks about himself in the third person. But at least he's RELEVANT.

Well.

Maybe not as relevant as that pastor guy from earlier this year who boldly went before Ed could think to do it and decreed a 30 day sex challenge.

Of course.

That guy's probably more relevant on account of the fact that he pastors Relevant Church, just outside of Tampa. (In fact, they're so relevant they even have a MySpace page. A MYSPACE PAGE. How cool is that? Probably not as cool as it was before Rupert bought MySpace back in '05. But. Still. Pretty cool, eh. Oh. And, Relevant, too.)

Now.

That Relevant Pastor guy got lots of press for his small church that meets in the Italian Club, across from Carmine's in Ybor City, Fla. Even made it on to the CBS News. THE CBS NEWS. (Cue Peter Gabriel – Big Time.) You can bet Gigachurch Pastor Ed sat up and took notice.

But.

He needed to let a little time pass. Wouldn't want to seem to be jumping on anyone else's bandwagon. And it would need to have that special Ed Young Jr. mark.

7.jpg 7 Days.

That's it! 7's a way more biblical number than 30. (Ed must be way more biblical on account of the fact that he's got way more sheep than that little shepherd guy from that church in Ybor City that meets across the street from Carmine's.)

Sex for Seven Straight Days. (Ed always loved him them triple entendres, eh.)

2ofEdsSheep.jpgAnd.

Besides.

Ed's not as Young as he once was. Seven he could probably do. (Apparently not.)

Heck.

His church of 20,000 rutting sheep was gonna be making a whole bunch more whoopee in those seven days than that little Ybor City almost relevant church ever could in 30. And it's all for Jeezuzah!

And so it came to pass that the sheep did as it was decreed.
And the news went out across the land.

Ed made a point of writing me to let me know that he was getting press attention, BIG TIME!:

WATCH FOR TV INTERVIEWS WITH ED AND LISA ON THE INSIDER AND INSIDE EDITION. CHECK LINKS FOR LOCAL LISTINGS. (Somebody oughtta tell Ed not to yell.)

We have been amazed at the local, national, and international media attention surrounding this powerful challenge, including Good Morning America, CBS Early Show, CNN American Morning and more. What a great opportunity for the church to step up and talk about these important topics!

Yes sirree, Bruce. You can never get enough sex. (Which I don't think quite qualifies as "topics", perhaps "topic". But at least it was an impotent topic – unlike the financial meltdown, people losing their homes, urban poverty, the Wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. I mean, if it wasn't for sex, none of those other things would even be an issue.)

But, perhaps Ed is being just a tad disingenuous when he says "We have been amazed…" Heck. If that good ole boy from Ybor City in that church across the street from Carmine's could make it on THE CBS NEWS, then surely Ed & the 20,000 Sheep would blow the roof off the sucker!

Ed. You are definitely too sexy for the Church.

kinnon

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A television editor, writer & director since 1978. A Christian since 1982. More than a little frustrated with the Church in the West since late in the last millennium.

18 responses to Jr. Ed Young Knows – Sex Sells

  1. HILARIOUS! Made me laugh out loud . . . although the picture creeps me out.

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  2. OMG! I see you found something to do this morning. This post is classic Kinnon. (and I can’t believe you had the um, guts, to use that picture. Great photoshop effects though. Dare I say that this post rivals the best of Brant Hansen?

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  3. Does the word juvenile come to mind?

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  4. Pastor M,
    Me or Ed? Or both of us? 🙂

    Grace, I think I’m channelling Brant. I sure miss his posts.

    Brad, Which part of which picture. I thought the 7 was rather nice. A little Zaxwerks 3D Invigorator in After Effects – sized and compressed in PS CS3. Or were you counting sheep?

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  5. I am hurting. I’m going to have to cut back on…..OH NO!!!!

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  6. And it’s all for Jeezuzah!

    Except the name of Jeezuzah isn’t even being mentioned.

    He says this isn’t a publicity stunt or for provocation.
    He’s a liar.

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  7. There they go, they’ve done it again. Umm actually make that again, again, again, again, again, again, again.

    But as a single person, I don’t get it.

    Why do these seeker/contemporary/relevant churches always focus on the family and we singles are just always out there. Oh well. Maybe I should sheep-shift myself over to Rick Warren’s place. At least there, I can get 40 days of purpose.

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  8. My first response: lol! My next response: Puke! My final answer: I wish these platform-seeking, self-promoting, kinda creepy, megalomaniac, CEO-pastors would stop telling the public (especially via mainstream media) that they represent what Christianity is all about. (And back to my second response: puke again!)

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  9. What the hell?!

    People are being tortured, raped, starved and murdered all over the world and all this asshat can do is screw his wife? Yep … I want to be a Christian when I grow up.

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  10. Sonja, thanks for the best and probably most appropriate comment thus far. I only wish that would have been my first response as well.

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  11. If I were a polygamist living somwhere in Southern Utah…it might be hard to cut down to seven times a week…

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  12. LOVE the second graphic. Maybe you can re-Photoshop it with the girl sheep knocking Ed upside the head with a PVC pipe. You know some of the wives among the “sheeple” have to be thinking that 🙂

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  13. No sex please…. I’m British!

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  14. Maybe church growth by reproduction? Gonna take a little longer.

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  15. honestly, i think brandon is onto something.. but even more immediate than just that next batch of babies..
    a family with offspring are more likely to put their roots down and invest in a local church.

    this is most definitely an attempt to deepen the offering plate…

    Arrrrr!

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  16. Todd – fan of Kinnon.tv November 25, 2008 at 9:12 pm

    Nailed it.
    (I can’t believe I just typed that without recognizing the pun.)

    Yes, you can use sex to sell a church. I guess we just found out how. Gotta tart her up to get some media attention, since an incarnational, missional life isn’t moving the merchandise–while those outside the faith wonder out loud about why megachurch evangelicals seem to be so hung up/repressed about sex. Had lunch with some corporate PR types today that saw Ed’s publicity mongering in the NY Times and made several comments about an abnormal preoccupation with sex. Drives me nuts.

    And don’t get me started on a woman’s perspective on this. The pubescent and hormonally driven “boys” thinking up this stuff need to grow up and realize their marital happiness doesn’t revolve around them gettin’ some on a nightly basis.

    And to the singles out there: I’m so sorry. Ashamed and sorry.

    Thank you for your time.

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  17. Beyond all the sex issues (which previous poster’s really hit on the head) that keep people wondering why we in the church keep “living between our navel and our knees”…

    Several large church pastors in my town (Charlotte, NC) have been forced to resign in the past few years due to plagiarism issues in their sermons. I wonder why that’s not applicable here? Or when “market share” is the goal, do most of those old “issues” just go away?

    Others are right: This is pretty distasteful.

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  18. And … now he’s made the NY Times … see? It’s easy!!

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